What Have I got to Lose?
by maddybob1
Summary: Rachel is tired of life at McKinley.Soon her dads give her an option she can't refuse and Rachel is leaving to go to Saint Charlotte's.Will she fit in? Will New Directions be able to get her back or will they permanently suffer for bulling her?
1. Chapter 1

_**Summery: Rachel is tired of the way people are treating her at **__**McKinley**_ _**soon her fathers offer her the chance she can't refuse, to go St. Charlotte's, the sistering school of Dalton Academy, **__**Will New Directions want her back? Will they try? Or will they suffer for bulling Rachel. Finchel in later chapters with a side of klain.**___

_**AN: hey! So this is my new fic! This is kind of drabble-ish but the other chapters aren't like this. I have all ready written the first 4 chapters of this story.**_

I hate it.

I hate the way people look at me when I walk through the corridors at school.

I hate the way that people try to trip me up when I'm walking to class.

I hate the way that I have to walk with my head down looking at my feet so that people don't start saying abuse when they notice it's me.

I hate that the only way people have a clue who I am is because of my past romance with Finn.

I hate that not even the Glee club have forgiven me for what I did.

I hate that people think that are break up was my entire fault.

I hate that he has already moved on.

I hate that Santana hasn't had the decency to quit Glee even though she is killing me inside.

And what I hate the most is that through this I haven't had a friend to talk to as all the people that I used to call my friends have all gone to Finn's side and I haven't a clue why.

I am thinking this whilst I sit on my bed, crying. What's the point of being strong when there is no body to strong for.

And today was the day that I got asked the question that enviably changed my life.

"Rachel," says Leroy smiling sympathetically followed by my other dad "we want to talk to you about transferring schools, to St. Charlotte's."

I say yes, because if I am honest what on earth have I got to lose?

_**A.N: what did you think? PLEASE review!**_

_**XX Maddie xx**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A.N: ok so this is isn't the best chapter but I will get better, I PROMISE! Tell me what you think!**_

_**I should have updated like AGES ago but I didn't... sorry, been super busy with my school concert, yeah I am just that kinda person but I love you all!**_

I walk up to my locker, there's no one waiting for me why would there be? It's me. Principal Figgings knows that I am leaving, he is leaving it to me to tell Mr. Shuster, it's a good thing I think, I'm one for being theatrical.

The lessons go fast and soon I am in Glee club I enter the room, no one looks up at me no one even notices that I have entered until I clear my throat loudly , then the only person who looks up is Mr. Shuster.

"I need to make an announcement." I say to him.

"Rachel nobody is going to like you if you tell them the problems with their performances in fount of their friends. Just sit down." He sighs.

Even my teacher is tired of me.

"No, I need to." I breathe. He sighs again but gestures for me to go to the front of the choir room and make my speech.

"Nobody cares Berry." Says Santana whilst filing her nails.

"I'm transferring." I announce. Everybody looks up and the room is filled with an indelibly loud silence.

"Excuse me?" asks Mr. Shuster dropping the pen he had in his hand.

"To saint Charlotte's. It's the Sistering School to Dalton Academy." I smile. I only found that out yesterday after me and my dad searched it and it the best news.

"Why?" says Finn standing up and looking me in the eyes, he is almost to close and I step away suddenly afraid of the contact he is forcing upon me. It's just too soon.

"Why do you think?" I whisper more to him than anyone else and he looks away sitting back down.

"Rachel I would have liked to know before you told everyone." Says Mr. Shue glaring at me a little.

"I was going to but for some reason you all think you know me when you don't and I refuse to take this anymore." I announce my eyes filling with hot painful tears.

"We need you Rachel, you're our friend." Says arty and Tina starts nodding franticly beside him.

"That's what I thought until the breakup but you all obviously only like Finn." I say though it hurts me.

"Your right." Bitches Santana. Everyone looks at her in shock at what she just said "forget it guys she is already gone."

"She's right." I whisper. "You don't need me, you need my talent. You'll have to just get by. Good bye, it's been... honestly it's been pathetic." I walk out a sea of voices following after me and Finn's face staring at the back of my head. This is for the best, I know it.

_**A.N: so what did you think? It's a little ruff I know but like I said it will get better!**_

_**PLEASE REVIW!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A.N so, I really have no excuse for not updating. This story is nearly at the good bits! LoL.**_

I slowly button up my shirt. It's been a week since I left McKinley. The Glee club haven't forgiven me but if I'm honest I don't care. I pick up the red tie on the side of my bed and slowly tie it, not in to a tight tiny knot but not a huge one. Then I get my skirt. The school skirt is black and pleated it goes to about knee length but I pull it up so it is just above my knees so it doesn't feel so different to what I normally ware. Next I need to change into is the black school blazer; it is much like Daltons but more feminine. I now put on the black tights, they look so different to what I am use to but they look so nice it makes me smile in spite myself. I place on my shiny black pumps and then dry and straiten my hair. I look at myself in the large mirror that my dads put up when I was 7 so I could look at my full posture. I hear the doorbell ring and run down stairs where I open the door to see one Kurt Hummel smiling at me "Rachel!" he smiles pulling me into a strong hug.

"Kurt? What are you doing here?" I ask laughing at his enthusiasm. I look at the boy I used to despise and notice that he isn't alone; standing next to him is Blain holding his hand. He looks sideways at him and I can see the connection Kurt always longed for.

"We heard you are now going to St. Charlotte's!" he beams "its right next to Dalton so we were wondering if you wanted a lift?"

"Of cores!" I smile "let me say goodbye to my dads." I rush upstairs telling them the arraignments then back down with my school bag.

I am led into a shiny silver car Blain gets into the front seat and starts driving with Kurt on my left "So Rachel I have to ask, why did you leave McKinley?" I shift in my seat uncomfortable suddenly.

"Umm. Well after the break up everyone was kinda judging me." I whisper. I know I need to be confident about talking about it, I'll obviously have to. To family friends and people I meet at my new school but it still kills me inside to think that we are no longer a item.

"Say no more." Smiles Kurt talking hold of my hand.

"We know some girls at Saint. Charlotte's ask for Lydia Read, Madeline Stone and Victoria Mosbee You'll get the right ones." Says blain looking at me in his mirror.

"Thanks." I smile.

"We need Rachel back." Says Mr. Shuster. It's the day Rachel left, she is no longer attending school and it's a week since she told the Glee club the news that she was leaving.

"Why, we didn't try to get Kurt back when he left?" snaps Mercedes.

"Because you guys, I hate to break it to you but this is your fault." Replies Mr. Shuster. "With Kurt, we had nothing left, Dave had been torturing and you guys did whatever was in your power to stop that from happening. You are being as bad as he was. You were bulling her."

"So I should be told of for breaking up with some chick that cheated on me with my apparent best friend?" spits Finn. He had been acting a different ever since she left, most of the Glee club were sure that this was because he had thought that they would get back together in time, now that she had left the school this seemed a lot less likely.

"Hey, don't call Rachel some chick, she is more than that you know she had feelings." Agues puck "we know that she will always be more than _some chick_to you."

Santana and Brittney shared looks, they were sure that Puck had feelings for Rachel even though he was all over Lauren there was defiantly something.

"She means nothing to me and nor do you for that matter." Shouts Finn glaring at Puck.

"You were the one that did the nasties with Santana." He smiles cockily.

"I will do it nasty to your face if you don't shut the hell up!" shouts Finn standing with his fist at the ready "I'm tired of people thinking they know me when they don't!"

"Is it just me or did Rachel say that exact thing like a week ago." Says Santana. The room is filled with silence exspet the noise of heads turning.

"Shut up!" shouts Finn. He reaches out a hand to punch Santana and she moves back in fear.

"You can't hit a girl." Shout Sam quickly.

"That's anything but a girl, she is the freaking devil!" cries Finn.

"ENOUGH!" shouts Mr. Shue over the heated augment taking place in his Glee rehearsal "Sit down." Everyone does, Finn brushing himself down. "We need to fix this. Look guys, Rachel wasn't perfect but you will all regret it if you don't try and fix it."

"I'll try." Says Quinn. She had been silently drawing in her notebook as the fight went on "I liked Rachel and you all gave her a pretty bad time. I'd like to know that I had done something for her seeing as she gave me hours of entertainment."

"Hold up, I though you to hated each other?" asks Mercedes.

"Yes we did have a lot of disagreements but I like her." Smiles Quinn. "But out of respect for her we should give her some time."

"Good it's settled." Smiles Mr. Shuster for the first time that day.

"You must be Rachel!" says a tall girl. She has brownie blond hair, its shoulder length with a side fringe clipped back in with a red clip. Her hair is in bunches at the sides of her face. "I'm Madeline. You are Kurt Hummel's friend?"

"Um yes." I say timidly. I got led to her by a tall female teacher she is the principal after telling me how amazing her school was she took me to her.

"Good. My friends are on their way, I'm sure that Blain told you about Lydia and Victoria." She smiles brightly and I nod "oh I should tell you that you need to have your hair tied up, I know it sucks but all of us need to. I have some spare bands if you want them?"

"Yes please." I smile.

"Do you want me to tie it up for you?" She asks.

"Please." I reply. I remember how formal I need to be but Madeline seems happy and really nice. She ties my hair up into bunches like hers.

"So Rachel to give you the info, the teachers hear are strict but kind," she stars walking and I follow next to her "Vicky will kill you if you call her Victoria but you need to in fount of any members of staff, her dad pays a lot of money to this school and we need him to be please with her. He hates it when people call her Vicky. Lydia is really nice. Oh and people call me Maddie but again not in front of teachers. Kurt says that you are interested in music is that right?"

"I am a singer, I am talented I can tell you now." I smile.

"Good," she says not seeming at all fazed by my vanity "You can join the Glee club, were not popular like the boys are but were not rejects."

"Wow." I say simply. Soon 2 girls come running up.

"MADDIE!" they call. "Oh you must be Rachel." Says one "I'm Vicky!" she is not tall or short her hair is also in bunches but there high and tight unlike Maddies.  
"I'm Lydia." Smiles a short girl. She has very pale skin and her hair is in a neat bob, its black.

"So, are you ready to go to class?" smiles Maddie and we start on our way.

I feel so special. I have what feels like friends, we laugh and giggle all the way to class and I feel so excepted, little did I know that the people that were not even in my mind, the people I was trying to forget were thinking about me one in particular couldn't sleep.

_**A.N: reviews = happy me.**_

_**Me = Human.**_

_**Human = god.**_

_**God = Life.**_

_**So if you think about it, Reviewing is life =P**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**A.N: HeyHey! This story has had LODES of reviews, I am so happy and to be honest SUPRISED! **_

_**I do know I am terrible at punctuation! I'm sorry but I do double check often I know that's not amazing!**_

_**Hope you like this chapter, it's not that amazing.**_

I hear 2 knocks on my house door. I've been at saint Charlotte's for a week and I love it. The teachers are strict but they are always so nice and the lessons challenge me in a way they never did in McKinley. I have my first Glee club rehearsal tomorrow, I'm really excited. Maddie says that she is left to do all the solos. I don't want to steal her spot light but if I am on the Glee club she doesn't have a chance of getting a solo ever again. I run down stairs and open the door to see someone I didn't expect.

Quinn.

The same Quinn who called me names like man hands. The same Quinn who cheated on the boy I loved... Love and pretended to have his baby. The same Quinn who gave Finn mono and the same Quinn who lied to the boy she _loves _about kissing him.

"Hey!" I say. I need to be over happy; I need to make her think that I am not having ANY doubts about my move. It's not true. I love my new school and I love having friends but I really miss New Directions.

"Can I come in?" she asks. She looks pretty, she is smiling at me in a way she never did which makes me expect she isn't here to catch up.

"Of cores, my dads are out." I giggle. I think of Finn suddenly, my dads are out meant allot more when I said it to him. It meant _you can come over and we can make out because there is no chance of my dads coming in_ somehow I don't see it meaning the same when Quinn is coming in, the only difference it makes is that if she is here to mock and ridicule me there is no one to protect me from her words.

"Well come on." I smile. I walk up the stairs to my bedroom where we both sit down on my bed. She smiles again at me "So, out of curiously why are you here? We were never great friends."

"Rachel, I wish I had been nicer to you," she says looking away quickly "you were always kind to me and the worst thing you ever did to me was, well kissing my boyfriend whilst I was dating him."

"Yeah sorry again about that." I smile looking away also. I suppose I'm not innocent. I kissed Finn in the auditorium. He was my first kiss, I know it's sad, the first kiss for a 16 year old girl to be with a boy in a relationship with someone else but it was pretty romantic. My perfect place I think seeing as the stage is where I belong. I snap back to the moment in hand. "Are you to dating?" I have to ask I just have to. They kissed after Quinn left cheerio's, everybody was talking about it.

"We were," she says looking at me sadly "he's not over you. I could tell, we tried to date, I broke up with Sam for him but it didn't seem like he ever has before."

"Oh." I say. I want to smile but it doesn't seem right, what I did was bad I know that now.

"If you joined McKinley again he would be yours for sure." Smiles Quinn. I know why she is here now, to get me to come back.

"Quinn, look I love it at Saint Charlotte's, I'm not going back." I say, it hurts me to think that I will never be singing with them again, to think that I will never be walking to the choir room. Well McKinley choir room but it's better to think that I will never be slushied again and to think that I will never be mocked again.

"It's not only that," she says, it's obvious that she using whatever she has to keep me now "we will make you popular, Mrs. Sylvester is looking for new Cheerio's. I'll show you a way you can get into the squad I'll teach you how to do the triple flip and make you like... like a new me!"

It's sad really, there is no chance that she will convince me but she is doing whatever she can to get me to come back. "I'm sorry Quinn but I can't go back."

"At least I tried, can we still be friends?" she asks. I want be bee theatrical and say _were we ever?_ But I won't I'll be nice seeing as she came, no one else bothered.

"Yes, I'd like that." I smile and a smile spreads across her and my face. She is really pretty, a lot more than me, though I hate to admit it. She hugs me giggling a little as she does so.

"Rachel!" calls the 3 girls. I smile and wave, I drove Blain and Kurt to school, and we take in a turn which is really fun. I can tell how much Kurt likes him but what is even nicer is that Blain is dating him. Kurt finely has someone to talk to, someone to hold hands with and someone to wake up for. I had that with Finn and miss it so much. I focus my attention on the 3 girls running to me with their arms open. They hug me smiling and laughing at the same time.

"Hey! Did you have a nice weekend?" asks Maddie.

"Yeah, it was good." I smile. Maddie seems different sad almost. "Are you okay?"

"Oh," says Lydia. She is really nice but I don't know her as much as the other girls, she is a lot quieter than them. "Rachel I need to talk to you about something."

"Um, ok." I smile. I follow Lydia into the corner of the sports grounds we are forced to wait on until school starts.

"Maddie is having trouble at home, her parents are separating and she really doesn't get on with her older brother but now she has to spend more time with him. It's getting really bad for her but she is always happier after Glee rehearsal. She is amazing and it's the only chance she has to express herself." Finishes Lydia.

Now I don't know what to do, I was going to take her solos but she needs them more than I do. "Oh, okay." I smile.

"I tried, she seems too... happy at her new school and it didn't work." Says Quinn to the Glee club. It's the day after her attempt and no one seems to be very pleased with her. "You didn't even bother."

"If you want her back so much then why don't you go and try?" asks Macadies to Mr. Shue.

"I could get arrested. Rachel has legally moved and I'm not allowed to go get children to join my school, it's immoral." He explains "Which is why it's down to you."  
"I'll try," says Brittney "I liked Rachel though she talked so much."

"I'll help her with that," says Artie "We'll go together."

"Okay, good work for today guys." Smiles Mr. Shuster leaving the room and heading of to his next lesson.

"We have a new member, welcome Rachel Berry!" smiles Maddie gesturing over to me where I stand up.

"Truly it is an honour that you would let me join your Glee club. Though I understand that you are all very busy, I would like to state that I believe this Glee club though large and lacking a certain amount of ambition that I am sure to begin, I think that we will have a chance to succeed in whatever we try." I say as fast as I can. All the girls just laugh.

"Ok so Rachel, we wandered if you would like to try a solo seeing as your new." Says Maddie. Lydia signals to me reminding me about this morning.

"How about a duet?" I smile.

"Okay!" she beams.

This school has taught me to do long division, to locate the republic of Ireland on a map but most importantly it has taught me how to be a good friend.

_**A.N: I know cheesy right?**_

_**Tell me what you think? With sweet sweet reviews! LOLS.**_

_**LOVE YOU ALLL**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**AN: I'm so sorry I haven't updated! I thought I had already put this chapter up! Lol 3**_

_**I'm in the middle of writing the next one, it's a really hard chapter to write, but hey you will understand at the end of this chapter!**_

_**I love you all!**_

Finn Hudson was not a sissy. He played video games, he talked to his step dad about girls and he never let anyone know his true feelings.

Anyone except Rachel Berry.

And she had broken his heart. Though it killed him to say it, he still loved her deeply and knew that she felt the same way but he couldn't let go that she cheated on him.

Ever since she had gone to this new school he had wondered if she had moved on and if she was seeing someone. Quinn wouldn't tell what happened when she went to Rachel's house which made him think that she was.

And that made his blood Boil.

How come she got to move one when he was stuck there thinking about her voice, her hair her eyes and lips?

People were trying to get her back but as far as he was concerned it was easier if she stayed away, though he missed her with every single aching bone in his body.

He was fine with thinking this until he ran into her.

It was a normal day; he had just been to football practice and was going to the locale shop to buy a bottle of coke when he saw her. She was standing there with a small bunch of girls who were giggling standing in the _teenage _section looking at the latest _Twilight_. He turned around, she looked so different _popular_ almost.

Rachel notices him to and suddenly puts her head down "Who is it?" asks Maddie.

"Umm he is my ex. I'll explain later." She says a blush covering her face. She knew that she would have to see him again eventually but something seemed so painful for her to not truly feel prepared.

"Is that Finn? I thought you made him up!" laughs Maddie. Rachel's not surprised. She had told the girls a little while ago and they had seemed suspicious. She thought it was because he sounded so out of her liege and if she was truthful to herself, she knew he always had been.

"Stop it he'll look over," whispers Rachel.

"Learn to live," say Maddie "you'll thank me for this, Hey Finn!" she calls. Rachel hits her but is forced to look over at the boy whom she use to love.

"Hi," he smiles. He heard the voice but knows it's not Rachel, she wouldn't shout like that "Who was that?" he asks.

"Just a friend." Smiles Rachel simply. She can see Finn looking her over obviously looking at her uniform she wore so proudly, he thought it was cute then scolded himself for thinking it.

"So... err how have you been?" he asks "I like the uniform, it suits you."

Rachel blushes strongly at his complement but tries and fails at pretending it meant nothing to her "I have been good."

"You and Kurt have been spending a lot of time together, I'm surprised that I haven't seen you more recently." He says with a hint of bitterness in his voice longing to get out.

"Well we didn't want to annoy you seeing as you don't like me particularly." She spits.

"don't say that Rachel," says Finn, he holds her hands suddenly and she gets so nervous she doesn't think she will be able to stay standing as if Finn is some celebrity taking a photo with her. She looks at him and remembers the pain she caused him and the hurt in his eyes. "I loved you." This was too much for her to handle and she moves back a little.

"It was nice to see you please tell New Directions that I miss them." She finalizes walking back to the girls who are looking at the awkward reunion taking place in front of them.

"Bye."

RACHELS POV

I hear a knock on my door, I am still angry with Maddie, what gave her the right to humiliate me in front of Finn of all people? I walk to the door and see Brittney and Arty standing (well sitting in Artie's case) looking at me with obviously fake smiles on their faces "Um, hi?" I almost ask.

"Rachel, can we come in?" he asks smiling still.

"Of cores." I say, I lead them to my living room and they sit down. "So, why are you here?"

"We know Quinn tried and failed to get you back to New Directions so we thought we might give it a try," smiles Artie.

This seems like it is going to be happening for a while but I don't care it's not going to work.

"We miss you Rachel though I understand one of the reason's you left is because you were jealous of my intelligence." Say Brittany obviously trying to be sympathetic. Artie laughs and I giggle but she just nods and smiles.

"I do miss you but I never got the star treatment in New Directions that I get in Saint Charlotte's. I have friends and stuff." I smile.

"Can I talk to Rachel alone for a moment?" Says Brittney looking at Artie.

"Ok, I'll go call Mr. Shuster and tell him we are here." Says Artie wheeling out.

"Rachel, I need to be honest with you." Smiles Brittney "You know how Santana knows every body's business for some weird reason."

"Um yeah." I say bitterly thinking of the girl I loathe and honestly think is the best reason to leave McKinley.

"Well when I was at hers I read her diary which means I don't only know her deepest secrets I know everybody's." She giggles and I sigh and nod. "Finn still likes you."

"He doesn't." I say not even thinking about what she has just said, it hurts too much.

"Well she was at his house and read his diary and it said he thinks about you all the time." She cays on. I try to hide the fact that this shoots electricity all through my body but I can't let her know that I feel anything towards Finn.

"How do I know that you're not just trying to get me to come back and lying because you know how important Finn is to me?" I say.

"Because how else would I know that you two ran into each other in the super market and he thought when he held your hands he wanted to never let go." She states smiling "I'm not just a pretty blonde." She giggles "though I want people to think it."  
"You could have been there." I say.  
"My last attempt. While you to were dating, you wouldn't put out for him and after telling him you wouldn't have sex until you were twenty-five you let him touch your breast. Ever since then he has loved you more." She states looking at me her eyes locking with mine "Look Rachel now that you know I'm not making this up I need to tell you that he still loves you deeply and he thinks about you all the time. He says that he will never love anyone like he loves you and he thinks that you are the most beautiful person he has ever seen."

"wow." I say staring at the ground below. Brittney leans forward and hugs me tightly. Artie roles back in smiling and he see's my eyes red and puffy.

"Rachel?" He asks.

"Um, I think you guys need to leave." I whisper "thought thank you for coming I need to umm just be alone for a while."

"Bye." Brittney says "I'll call you." And I hope she will, she is nice.

She leads Artie out and I stay sitting looking at my feet. I put my head in my hands and start wailing. I feel my insides twist around and my head pounding. I hurt all over and the only thing I can say, scream even his name. My dad comes in.

"Rachel!" he says.

"Get lost! You don't care about me, you never did I just need you to leave me." I shout and run out of the door slamming it behind me. I leave my house running down the street. People are looking at the good private school girl Rachel Berry crying and cursing about the stupidity of her life. I run as fast as I can and trip over a bump in the road. I cut my knees because of the short skirt I am wearing and just lie on the ground in pieces, in pain in nothing but agony. I love him so much and he loves me to and we can't be together, we never will and I can't stand this at all, "I hate my life." I shout crying and lie back down. I see a pair of converse trainers and look up to see someone unexpected looking at me slightly with pain in his eyes.

"Rachel?" He asks.

_**A.N: who is it? I haven't actually decided yet I am between 2 people but tell me in the reviews who you want it to be and I will use the most popular... Probably! Xxxxx**_

_**I am really bad at writing when it's not in a P.O.V so maaaagor sorry about the first part!**_

_**To state, she is angry because Finn likes her but is too stubborn to except it, thought I should mention that, I didn't explain that very well in the actual story.**_

_**Maddie.**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**A.N I know its been yearsss since I updated, I just forgot! I hope you like this. It took me a long time to right. I loves you all!**_

"Rachel?" he says with pain written across his face, and a single eyebrow raised.

"Blain?" I almost sigh I'm so embarrassed "I'm so embarrassed."

"What the hell? Who did this to you?" He asks looking at me concernedly.

"Umm. I..." I can't bring myself to re-live the moments that have been killing me.

"Would you like to come with me?" he says smiling at me slightly.

"Okay." I say looking up at him. He offers me a hand and I pull myself of the ground though my feet and knees are aching so much.

"Your knee!" he says looking at the red blood that's seeping from a circle shaped cut on my petit knee the red liquid flowing onto my white sock.

"It's okay..." I say whipping away a painful tear that's leaking out of my eye.

"Come on then." He smiles again. I follow him limping to his car where he sits in the front and shows me to the passenger seat. "Do you want to call your mum and dad?"

"My dads." I correct, he didn't know and I think he likes that I have 'dads'...

"Ahh, I see."

I phone my dads telling them that I'm okay and I'm with a friend now. There so supportive and kind to me which makes me feel disappointed in my actions...

"So, Rachel you still haven't told me why I saw you crying on the road side." He smiles when we pull up into his house "My parents are out, though my younger sister is in, just ignore her."

He leads me into his house where he puts his kettle on so he can make coffee. "You've met Finn I assume." I say.

"Yes, I have though I haven't really talked to him much I think he is slightly homophobic..." He looks away obviously thinking. "I also know that you two used to be an item."

"I found out that he still has feelings for me." I whisper. He stays unfazed by what I have said. He sits at the other side of the table to me and looks at me synthetically.

"And this is a bad thing because?" He asks simply passing me a white coffee mug.

"Because I still have feelings for him." I whisper taking the fist sip of the strong, hot liquid.

"I still don't get it, you each have feelings for each other so why are you devastated?" he puzzles.

"Because I joined St. Charlottes because we weren't an item anymore and I thought he hated me... now that I know that's not the case, the I changed schools for no reason. I just don't know what to do any more." I say feeling a strong twist in my stomach making me feel like I'm going to throw up.

Blain looks at his coffee cup deep in thought before taking a long. loud sip and running his hands through his perfect curls. "Do you want to get back together with him?" he asks finally looking up without really moving his head.

"Of course I do but it's not that simple, I mean I cheated on him with his best friend no one would want to be with me, I'm a lying bitch!" I say drowning myself with heavy, thick self pity.

"Now that's not true. The way I see it Rachel is that you have 2 options. You can either go to Finn and express your love to him in an elaborate song and dance potentially ruining your relationship forever. Or you can leave it for a while and except your differences and move on for a little bit." He says.

"Can I pick one?" I grin.

"Hhh, I'll go get my guitar."


	7. Chapter 7

_**A.N: hey, it has been ages and I have no excuse! Sorry! This chapter is written for my friend Leyla, who's name I haven't used but I used a lode of other's of my friends names so this is for you m'darling. Haha**_

_**Hope you all like it ;)**_

"I like that." Smiles Blaine while sitting on his bed with his gaiter on his knee playing the cords simply. "So make it seem like it's a sad song?"

"Until we get to the chorus." I giggle, I don't know whether it's the sixth can of coke or the idea of maybe getting together with Finn but I feel like I could just jump about.

"Okay I think we're ready." He smiles "lets-"

"BLAINEENNNEEE!" says a un identified voice "BLAIINE!" it calls again even louder.

"What is it?" He calls in reply "I'm sorry Rachel."

"Come into my bedroom NOW!" shouts the voice.

"Not right now." He replies shaking his head and rolling his eyes "I have a friend over."

"Well Mom says that you're not aloud friends over since the instance with that Kurt dude." It says in a mocking voice "If you don't come then I'll tell her, but the friend can come in to."

"I'm so sorry Rachel." He blushes obviously embarrassed by the Kurt reference "We should probably go."

"Don't worry." I laugh following him down the hall until we reach a room. The door is pink and the name Leyla is pasted in lettering from a magazine, Blaine walks in and I follow shortly after. Sitting on her bed is a little girl no older than the age of 10.

"I need help on my homework." She demands.

"God, I have things to do." Says Blaine his eyebrows firmly knitted together "can't you just do it later?"

"No." She pouts.

"I can help her, you could go tell Kurt of are plans." I smile.

"I'm sorry Rachel, I can't make you do that." He says shaking his head "I'm being really selfish."

"No, it's not trouble seriously." I smile ushering him out of the room "It will be fun."

I look at the small girl sat down. Her hair is dark like Blaine's but it is striate and long. She has it down though it's messy and un cared for. There is writing on her hand where she has obviously been drawing in frustration. I look round her room, there are pictures of the obvious child idols, Selina Gomes, Justin Bieber and Miley Ciruse, I look and see a photo in a frame it's of her and Blaine, he had her in his arms and is hugging her from the back beaming with her beaming too.

"Who are you?" she asks not making eye contact.

"I'm Rachel, I'm Kurt's friend." I smile sure she will know who Kurt is.

"Oh." She replies simply. I sit down on the bed next to her and see the work book in front of her.

"What is the homework?" I ask looking down at the book. There is un even writing with scribbles out and pencil marks.

"I have to write a story." She says obviously trying to make it hard for me.

"And what are you writing about?" I ask.

"I'm writing a story where there is a girl and her brother gets eaten by a rabid crocodile and she gets all the attention." She smiles.

"Why?" I ask.

"Because Mrs. Allen says it's good to write about things that you know. I know that because I dream about it every night." She smiles evilly reminding me strongly of sue Sylvester though I get the image out of my head as fast as I can.

"Do you not like Blaine?" I ask "he's really nice." This I know for sure, he has been helping me write a song to sing to Finn, were going to go over there later and I'm going to go into his bedroom, blains going to play the backing and are I am going to sing a heartfelt love song to him.

"He used to be. He had the nicest girlfriend, she would braid my hair and sing to me and she was so cool." She smiles looking into the distance "At that time Blaine bothered to talk to me."

"And what happened?" I ask.

She looks at her feet and sighs; she imitates Blaine's voice "Mom, Dad, Leyla. I'm gay." Her hands ball into fists "Now I just get stupid boys over and none of them will tie my hair, Kurt is nice but he isn't a girl."

"If you want I can be your kind of older sister." I smile "Plus it's obvious you need a new I idol I mean Hannah Montana?" I take the pillow of the side of her bed and squeeze the side and a tinny recording of 'super girl' plays filling the room with are giggles.

"Okay." She smiles "I need to be honest I don't really need help it's just that I heard a girl voice and I was being hopeful..."

"Do you want me to tie your hair up?" I giggle "I mean I am pretty good, look at mine." I beam showing her my neatly straitened hair "also I have to say I am a good singer much better than this Hannah Montana crap."

"Okay!" she giggles.

We sit on the bed laughing and giggling about what we're doing though what I don't realise is that the time that we are using is valuable time, time that ticks away to fast. Because you can do a lot in an hour, watch an episode of house, read a Broadway Today magazine or even sometimes start a relationship...

_A.N: haha, that chapter was kinda me and my dream of having Rachel Berry as a sister. No offence Milllie... haha. Tell me what you think in reviews (: I love you all!_


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